Take Care of You, Too - Tips for Writers

We have been through a lot over the last year and a half. Some, more than others. The pandemic and its chaos has forced everyone to change, adapt, and extend grace to others. I suggest that you include yourself.

There are going to be days that you don’t feel like writing. It’s okay to stray from your schedule. Just make sure to have a plan to get back on track. Don’t beat yourself up. Learn from the situation and do your best. And if you have contractual deadlines, make sure to build in time when planning to accommodate a few skip days.

Sadness, losses, and disappointments are part of life, but that doesn’t make them any easier to cope with. Make sure you give yourself time and space to grieve.

Take care of your health. Make sure you’re eating right, exercising, and getting enough sleep. I spend way too much time at my desk these days. I need to find more ways to move around.

Reach out to others to talk or visit. Writing is a single-person sport most of the time, but you do need contact with others. Find a crew of writers. Having a support network is invaluable for advice, celebrations, and to keep you motivated.

Try not to dwell or fixate on the disappointments. It’s easy to get mired in that quicksand, and sometimes, it’s difficult to get out of. If you’re not in the mindset to write, work on other tasks (e.g. revisions, editing, queueing up blog posts, social media tasks, or administrative tasks that you never get around to.) You can still be productive and work on your manuscript later.

News anchor, Lester Holt’s closing line is always a great reminder for all of us, “Take care of yourself and each other.”

Stuff I Learned during the Pandemic

This has been a crazy, sad, and trying time, and we’ve all be asked to do things differently. And there have been many disappointments and cancellations. I hope you and your family are safe and healthy!

I was reflecting on this and wondering if I should have started a journal. Life was so busy (my day gig is in IT), and we were working long hours getting ready for a massive work from home effort that I didn’t have time. We’ve settled into a routine now. My big days out are the ones where I’m manager on duty in the office or when I head off for groceries.

Here are some of my learnings or realizations…

1. Do not put on lipstick before you put on your face mask. (I’d never worn a mask before.)

2. Wood glue works great for making crafts with wine corks. I made a Christmas tree and a heart-shaped wreath.

3. I miss my stand-up desk that’s at the office. I have to figure out new ways to stand and stretch at home. My job and writing time are very sedentary.

4. I bought a pedal exerciser that fits under my home desk. I put long conference calls on mute and pedal. It helps me get moving.

5. I do like the extra writing time each day because I’m not commuting for two hours each day.

6. My fuzzy coworkers like to hang out in the office where I work. But sometimes, they snore loudlyTrying or pick the worse time to play with the loudest squeaky toy.

7. I am halfway through my Goodreads reading challenge already for the year. And I’ve made a huge dent in my TBR pile. Who’s on Goodreads?

8. We finished a large jigsaw puzzle (covers of the early Hardy Boys mysteries). I wanted to frame it to hang in my office next to my Nancy Drew one. My husband figured out a quick way to flip it to put the sticky backing on it. We slid it on a large piece of cardboard and sandwiched it with more cardboard. Then it was an easy peasy flip, and none of it came apart.

9. My two favorite social media updates are from Pluto Living (a schnauzer in Candaland who gives pandemic advice) and Moonpie Starbox (several doxies dubbed with kid conversations). These are the highlights of my adventures on the big wide web. Check them out. They are both good for lots of laughs.

Mustangs and Rearview Mirrors

My husband asked me to help him bleed the brake lines in his '69 Mustang convertible this weekend. Pumping and releasing the brakes several hundred times gave me a moment to observe and ponder. I had a '74 Mustang as my first real car in the 80s, and the technology of his convertible was close to my yuck yellow one with the avocado-colored top. (I saved my money from my part-time job to have it painted red.)

I drive a 2015 Mustang now, so looking at the gears and switches was a trip down memory lane. The '69 has slides for the defroster and heat (no air conditioning), a cylinder on the floor for the high beams, a cassette player, metal slide seatbelts, windows that wind down, a hard plastic steering wheel with a mental arc for the horn, and a square key for the ignition and a round one for the trunk. It also has an ashtray and cigarette lighter.

Juxtaposed to my '15, I don't have to take the key out to open the doors or start the engine as long as it's in my purse. I can even start the engine remotely if I want to warm the car up. And the kickin' sound system, phone, and climate controls are changed on the touchscreen in the dash, or I can use voice commands. I can get music through AM, FM, satellite, my phone, or a host of other devices.  And I can enjoy my tunes from space in my heated or cooled seats.

This week is all about memories. My high school reunion is coming up soon, and I'm looking forward to seeing friends who've known me since kindergarten and the old high school. We're going to the homecoming game on Friday. At some point, we're the same people from back then, but in other ways, we're not. We've changed (on all levels), and had a lot of experiences outside of those school walls we shared for twelve years.

We've come a long way. I love the nostalgia of the reunion and the classic cars. It's fun for a summer cruise with the top down, but for every day life, I like my airbags, computer-controlled engine, anti-lock brakes, power steering, and padded steering wheel. 

I love visiting the past. The nostalgia and memories are great. But like with the cars, I've adapted to the technology and ways of today. And, there's a reason that the rearview mirror was designed to be a lot smaller than the windshield.

Enjoy the memories and where we've come from, but celebrate the present and where you're going. Every decade has its own surprises.

The '69 Mustang's dashboard

This is where roll down the window comes from...

My 2015 Mustang

What Would You Like to Tell a Younger Version of You?

I keep telling myself that I'm not middle-aged. I plan to live to a hundred, so I have some years before I reach my midpoint.

I'm at that strange time where I feel pops and creaks. Fun and dare-devil activities have been toned down for fear of doing real bodily harm. I've roller skated, skied, sledded, sailed, and tubed. I can mark those off the old bucket list. Though, I'd still like to try hang-gliding one day in Kitty Hawk. I ruptured an Achilles tendon a few years back, and it took years to get back to semi-normal. I still can't descend steps quickly or wear high heels. So now, there's always that little voice in my head when I think I want to have an adventure.

I have high school friends who are becoming grandparents. How did that happen? We were just in college. I also have some high school friends who have toddlers because they waited late in life for kids or they started a second family.

Being in the sandwich generation is interesting. I am reminded daily of my dinosaur status by the twenty-somethings at work. I went to a trendy store at the mall on Friday to get my niece a gift card for Christmas. I knew standing in line at the cash register that I was clearly on the path to becoming one of the "old" people. The store was too dark, and the music was some throbbing techno-tronic industrial pop that sounded more like screeches and screams. In the fifteen minutes that I was there, I couldn't decipher any words. Then kin of the Addams Family waited on me. I had flash backs to Halloween, and I felt like Marilyn Munster in the store. They all were staring at me. If you don't know who Marilyn is, Google her. I'm sure there are some episodes on YouTube.

I just want it noted that I'm not ready for the glue factory yet. I'm finally at a point in my life where I don't worry as much as I used to. I wish I would have enjoyed my twenties more and not stressed so much. If I could talk to my younger self, here's my advice.

1. I have reached the point in my life where I don't care what's trending in pop culture or fashion. I don't know the latest bands or who's kissing whom. I'm interested occasionally, but there are too many other things that grab my attention.

2. Don't stress so much. You cannot take life or yourself that seriously. Who cares what others think or say. Wear what you want to wear (as long as all the important parts are covered).

3. Forgive and let the small stuff go. There are stupid people in this world, and you can't always fix them.

4. Be kind to others, even when you don't feel like it.

5. Jettison friends or acquaintances who constantly belittle or bring you down. Don't feel like you have to continue these relationships because you've invested time and energy. Spend your time and energy where it's appreciated.

6. Don't isolate yourself. You need friends, confidants, and healthy relationships. Balance the social media with real human contact.

7. Enjoy life. Marvel at the sunrises and rainbows. Don't miss the fun because you're preoccupied with the small things. Unplug once in a while.

8. Keep all of your life in balance.

Enjoy what's left of your weekend. It's going to be in the high 50s here in Central Virginia. (That's a gift for December.)  I'm going outside with the Pair of Jacks to play.